In astrology, there is a fun thing called a “cazimi”. This happens when a planet is closely conjunct the Sun (0-1 degrees away). Cazimi’s bring insight, knowledge, and discovery. When planets reach that critical degree, they are in the eye of the storm. Chaos surrounds them, but they are at peace. Prior to a cazimi (when a planet is 8 degrees away from the Sun), the planet is combust - it’s hidden behind the Sun’s rays. In turn, the significations of said planet also become hidden, overshadowed, or “burned”. That is, until it reaches 0-1 degrees away from the Sun. When this happens, it’s born anew, and there is a sudden “Aha!” moment that takes place. In this case, Venus was born again. This means that topics relating to one's money, relationships, partnerships, etc. have been brought back to life. How it manifests depends on one's chart. For me, it was relational.
I have always been a forgiver - I still am. I am a slut for second chances. And third ones. And fourth ones…you get the idea. I have the tendency to see people for what they could be, and not how they actually are. This gives them the ability to treat me horribly, and unfortunately, I’d just take it. On the day the cazimi went exact, the first thing I did was scroll through my phone (sue me). As I was going through different snaps, I opened one that was…less than ideal. That's putting it nicely. If I wanted to be messy, I would call it disgusting, inappropriate, [redacted], [redacted]. I don’t want to explicitly say what the snap was, but I figure most people can pick up what I’m putting down. My response to said video was to tell them that what they sent was gross and utterly tone deaf. They responded with laughing emojis.
Their response left me in shock. At first, I was going to chalk it up to a lapse in judgment, and say it was an honest mistake. That’s when it hit me. IT WASN’T A MISTAKE! Their action was intentional, and me giving it excuses was nothing more than apologetic delusion. If their reply left me in shock, my initial response left me horrified. I was about to justify that behavior. It was right then and there that I realized that I can’t allow this to keep happening. Giving people free reign over how they treat me is a life I do not want to live. I promptly blocked that person on everything and started deliberating my other relationships.
This cazimi let me see and accept people for how they really are. I shouldn’t have to beg someone to treat me how I wish to be treated. I have friends that do that naturally, why can’t it be the same for all of them?
Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a forgiver - just not a masochistic one.